So my mom so sweetly reminded me, in the way that she does, last night while on the phone with her, that I haven't updated this blog in a bit. It's true. When life gives you lemons, you do what? Make lemonade eh? So lately, I guess I'm just getting tired of lemonade, and the wear and tear of stress, unknowing and just plain bad luck is getting me down. Something's got to give eventually, and who knows when or what it will be.
So what's been going on here? Jer got back from OK late Monday night, so it's nice to have him back. Recently he applied for a job with the company that his BIL works for, the position was available in MO, so Jeremy did a lot of research on the state and decided that even if the job doesn't work out and he's not hired (which it didn't work out) that he was interested in moving to MO anyways because the cost of living is so low compared to MT. Problem is... his family (wife and children) are here in MT until Emma is out of school in the summer, and he's doesn't have a job in MO. I guess those are two problems. LOL! He wants to seek employment in MO, but that's a little difficult when you have a nag of a wife (ie. me) who would like him to be home. *sigh* So we're just having a bit of a rough patch. I'm just really conflicted and just plain tired. Ugh. Last night was a super rough night as well, as soon as Emma got out of school we took one of our cats, Nemo, to the vet and apparently he's got heart disease and a long list of other various things wrong with him. His out look is quite grim, and I'm okay with that, he's about 11 years old, and things get old eventually. I just am bummed that it ended up being more money than we can afford at this point. Some people (ie. Jer) doesn't understand the love that one can obtain while owning a pet. It's just beyond him. He doesn't grasp it, and probably won't be able to understand, ever. It's just a feeling that one gets while petting a loved animal, while looking into their furry face, the calm that one feels when near their animal and the overwhelming wish and hope for them to be pain free and well taken care of. It's how I've felt for all of my animals. With Mouse passing away not too long ago (it will be one year in May), it's just a little soon for me to have to deal with this all over again. It's just something that you either get or don't get, this feeling inside. And well, Jer just doesn't get it. "It's just a cat." or "Well take him back in there and tell them to put him to sleep." or something else as equally detached. It's just not that easy for me. Wish it were sometimes, but it's not. Granted I'm not as attached to Nemo as I was Mouse... I had Mouse for about 13 or so years, and Nemo's been with me from birth (I have his mom too, Tigger, but she's built like a brick shit house, hard as nails, LOL) and that was about 10 or 11 years ago. That's a long time to get and stay attached to something as simple as a "cat". *shrug* I don't know. Guess I'm just venting now. I don't blame Jeremy for not being attached to anything that isn't "human", but it kind of makes me sad that he can't find that pleasure inside his heart. Ah well.
It's that time of year again when folks rummage about w/ fistfuls of cash spending it willy nilly on their hearts desires. Ahhh, to be carefree and careless. That was us at one point in time, but now it's all about business and getting shit paid that needs paid. So while we wait rather impatiently, I've compiled a list that we will strictly adhere to when Uncle Sam delivers our money. I'm sure he's coming by horseback from like... Maine or somewhere equally far away. LOL!
I have a few pictures to share that I've taken over the last couple of days which I will share now, and end my pointless rambling. :) Hope all is well w/ everyone and that you're all doing better than I am. Hahah!
1 comments:
I know the pain you feel, Sarah. I am sorry that you have to go through this. It's hard to know when it is the right time to put a beloved pet down- I went through the same thing with Shelsea. As far as moving to Missouri, whatever is supposed to happen will. I believe that everything happens the way it is supposed to- it is getting there that is the hard part. We are all here for you guys though, and we love you :)
Jess
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